lets hear it for the boys

As a woman, I think beauty is something we all recognize in each other and hope to find in ourselves. However, like a lot of ladies, I often find it much easier to see my own flaws and imperfections and failings and if beauty is present it’s only for a moment and the instant I turn my head the wrong way or say the wrong thing it will disappear from my view as quickly as it arrived. I’ve been praying lately that I would be able to not only see for myself, but to offer to others, the beauty and femininity I’ve been uniquely given by God, because such things truly aren’t mine to boast about or to slander.

This Sunday my pastor spoke about the roles Christian men are called to play in the kingdom of God. For the past few weeks I’ve been thinking about a lot of the themes he discussed and his words really helped to crystallize some of those thoughts and prayers for me. The thing is, I haven’t always appreciated the male portion of our species. If I’m honest with myself, for a good part of my life, from adolescence through my late teens, I was pretty apprehensive about most men, particularly ones close to my age. My anxiousness was by and large due to fairly normal (though still entirely terrible) teasing I endured at the hands of boys throughout my school years. As a chubby, shy, smart girl, I’m sure I was the perfect target for bullies.

For that reason, I just didn’t trust most guys and therefore never really pursued relationships with them as friends or on a romantic level. Growing up, my physical beauty was rarely if ever affirmed by any man so I just assumed I wasn’t attractive to them and spent lots of time hiding myself away. Thankfully, God is really amazing about bringing healing and restoration and growth to the broken areas of our lives and today I can say, without hesitation, that I really do enjoy most of the men in my life and that I feel more comfortable with my appearance than I ever have. I know I won’t ever be that woman who turns heads when she walks down the street or makes jaws drop when she enters a room, but I feel confident that even on my worst days I have a distinctive and undeniable loveliness that goes well beyond the surface.

I’ve also been thinking a bit this week about where I fit into the lives of the various men I come in contact with on a regular basis and what roles I’m meant to play in their lives. What uniquely feminine gifts do I have to offer to the friends and fathers and teachers and bosses and coworkers? And what do they have to offer me? How can I as a single woman, be an encouragement to them? I pray that I, along with the other women they come in contact with, would be a source of strength and renewal to my male friends and family and that I would be able to hear and receive the words they have to speak to my heart as well.