8 Random Things About Me

I did this one pretty quickly.

1. I love formatting office documents. I could do it all day. I’ve undoubtedly wasted way too many work hours lining up paragraphs and shading cells and creating beautifully bulleted lists.
2. I remember the first time I ate Fettuccine Alfredo. I was three years old and with my family at Epcot in Disney World. It immediately became my favorite food for the next 10 years.
3. I considered the following majors at some point during my education: Middle School Education, Psychology and Counseling, Graphic Design, Small Business, Journalism, and Marketing. I settled instead on Mass Communications with a television production focus. I still don’t know if I made the right decision.
4. During my senior year of high school, most of my closest friends were juniors.
5. I prefer singing into my thumb to busting out the old hairbrush when I feel the need for a little personal karaoke time. I did this the other day while driving because Band of Gold came on the radio. It was late at night and I didn’t really think anyone could see me but I forgot that my passenger side window was down. When I looked over, there was a dude in the car next to me chuckling. I was mildly embarrassed, but decided that since I’d never see him again, I should really just ignore him and enjoy my sing-along. I mean how often does Band of Gold come on the radio? Not often.
6. I have a consistently accurate intuition regarding people who are close to me.
7. I grew up going to church but had never been an official member of one until several months ago.
8. I find Teen Girl Squad to be endlessly quotable.

• In the thrift store: “These clothes smell like grandmas.”
• At the Chinese buffet: “Three spring rolls please”… “Ow my stomach lining!”
• After meeting a vertically challenged dude: “Tompkins, how do you be so short?”
• After an injury: “My blood hurts.”
• Whenever: “How you lookin’?” SOOOOO GOOD!”

Spoiler Alert

Beauty and the Geek kicked off its 4th season last week. I really do love any show that follows people with social awkwardness or phobias and helps them change and grow. I enjoyed Made, and Can’t Get a Date, and Why Can’t I Be You. I even watched The Pick Up Artist this year. And yes, I’m completely aware of the irony of a guy who calls himself Mystery and dresses more flamboyantly than Liberace teaching other men how to pick up women.

As for Beauty and the Geek, I have, since the show’s beginning talked about the how the concept might work in reverse, meaning that geeky girls would be paired with good looking guys. I believe it would be extremely interesting as a psychological experiment, but entirely terrible as reality tv. Its my contention that the guys would be unable to get past the girls’ looks and bother to actually help them. I think men who are overly focused on their own appearance usually don’t even see women who are not classically beautiful. I’m not really making a moral judgment, but I don’t think I’m off-base in that observation. Feel free to correct me if I’m wrong, but I see a whole heck of a lot more geeky men with beautiful men than vice versa. In fact I honestly can’t think of a situation in which I have ever seen the reverse. Considering this, I was really surprised when I read that the “twist” this season would be the inclusion of a reversed couple. Then it all made sense when they were introduced. I immediately recognized Sam as an actor. I’ve seen him in other things, but mostly I recognized him from one of my favorite guilty pleasure movies, Brink!. I didn’t recognize the girl, but her dress and hair and demeanor are honestly just way too geek-cliché to be entirely real.

Sam Horrigan and the oh-so-dreamy Eric Von Detton in Brink!

My prediction is that this “team” will win immunity (along with one other real team of course) in the next few challenges. They will spend at least a few weeks in the house and then at a predetermined point, will be eliminated or revealed. If they are eliminated, at some point, possibly not until the end, it will be revealed that they are both actors and were included as part of the group to observe the other teams and evaluate their growth and performance. It’s certainly possible that I could be totally wrong, but I actually have a pretty decent track record for predicting the ins and outs and eventual winners of reality show competitions.

Honestly, I’m not entirely thrilled when reality shows use ruses like this to create extra drama. I miss the days of the original Real World and Road Rules where people just kind of hung and out and lived their lives while video tape was rolling. Of course reality tv has ever been completely authentic but it was a lot more “real” 15 years ago than it is today in the era of Laguna Beach and Survivor and the Real World/Road Rules Sleeze Fest Challenge – not that I don’t watch those shows, because I totally do, I just don’t have delusions about their supposed reality. Anyway, that’s a whole new topic for another day…

secrets of the hotness

I am, by default, due to my overwhelming and astounding attractiveness (stop laughing, folks), an expert on all things health and beauty. As such, I’ve decided to compile for your reference, a list of several of my favorite products. Feel free to take notes.

• Queen Helene Mint Julep Facial Scrub: The best exfoliator ever. Seriously. If you don’t try anything else I mention, try this. It isn’t too harsh, but actually does exfoliate your skin unlike 90% of the products out there which contain something completely useless they like to call microbeads. I get mine at ULTA. Boys, you can use this too, exfoliation is for everyone.

Side note: I’m a sucker with a capital S for good packaging, which as you can see, this product does not have. However, it’s almost one of those products whose packing is so bad it’s awesome. Almost.

• The tongue scraper: Available where fine tongue scrapers are sold. Use one once and you’ll never want to be without it because you’ll see all the grossness that takes up residence on the back of your tongue after a good night’s sleep. Combine with a healthy swishing of Listerine Cool Mint and you’re good to go.

• John Frieda Brilliant Brunette Shampoo: Mostly I’m just in love with the scent which is sort of cocoa-like, and lovely. I also quite enjoy the Starlit Waves Enhancing Spray which gives a great summer beachy look for those of us who haven’t actually made it to the beach this year. Why the heck have I not made it to beach this year? Dang it.

Incredible packaging, by the way.

• Very Sexy by Victoria’s Secret. It’s a bit floral, and a has slight oriental tinge, but is just overall a really feminine, sexy scent. I also love Very Sexy for Him. If a I ever do end up with a boy to call my own, he’s totally getting this for Christmas, or his birthday – whichever comes first after an appropriate amount of dating time. And, while we’re on the topic of men’s fragrances, on the right guy a little splash of classic Old Spice can make a girl weak in the knees. Just sayin’.

• Red nail polish. I don’t do my fingernails because they chip too easily, but bright red toenails are classic.

• Bare Minerals Foundation: Yes, I’m a convert. Its the most comfortable foundation ever and the coverage is great. I have much fewer break-outs when I’m using it, which is a nice bonus.

 

So there you have it. Now not all of you can really aspire to be as sexy as me, but maybe with the help of a half-dozen products you’ll be on your way.

Go

Since apparently a good 90% of the people who have visited this blog are looking at this post which includes a discussion of the pop band Hanson’s documentary and album, I figured I’d just go ahead and feed the mania. I quite enjoy these two songs.

Enjoy, fangirls. And for everyone else, behold the poppy goodness that is Hanson. You know you don’t turn the radio dial when Mmmbop comes on. Don’t even front.

I literally hated this song when I first heard it, but it grew on me.

As noted by my friend Beth, I do love a good gospel choir in a pop tune.

iGoogle

I never thought I’d be someone who would use a customized homepage. But dang it if I don’t love me some iGoogle. I’m typing this post from it right now. I’ve got my calendar, my gmail, my blog reader, my maps, my news, and the weather all on one page. It’s awesome.

I’m sure I’m seriously late to the party in this arena. I’m also sure there are slicker more exciting homepage applications out there, but I just got this one set up how I like it so I’ll probably stick with it for a while.

Now if only wordpress would add a digg widget I’d be all smiles. I’m such a dork.

singleness

The topic’s been coming up a lot lately among friends and associates and of course as a single gal, the fact that I do not currently have a significant other (that phrase cracks me up) crosses my mind on occasion. I haven’t actually been in many serious relationships and although I’ve dated a bit, I’ve always been extremely hesitant to call anyone my boyfriend (another hilarious phrase when you actually think about it). I’m not afraid of committment. I actually really would love one, but I just haven’t dated many people that fit the bill.

Despite the fact that I would be thrilled to find that special someone (are there any non-ridiculous ways of saying that?) and spend the rest of my life with him, I am surprisingly (to me anyway) quite satisfied with my single status as of late. I like being able to drop what I’m doing and go help or hang out with a friend. I like having time to myself without having to answer to anyone. I like having total control over the remote. I also really like meeting new people with whom possibilities abound.

Essentially, I’m happy with my life. I have some terrific friends. I’ve got a good job. I have a hilariously entertaining dog. I’m part of a church I love. I’m also just extremely excited to see what God has in store for me next. Maybe its the adventure of romance. That would be awesome. I can’t wait. It’s just that I don’t feel incomplete without it like I used to and that’s kind of a relief.

fixd

My car is currently in the shop. I’m such a girl about cars. If it gets me from one place to the next, I’m happy. When it no longer does that, I’m annoyed. Looks like it won’t be a huge, massively expensive deal though. The vacuum lines needed to be replaced and there’s a minor leak in the exhaust that can be fixed with a spot weld (just so you know, I’m only repeating what the mechanic said to my dad. I have no actual concept of what any of these things really mean). I do however understand that means no major parts replacements. I’m sure the labor will cost a bit but I’m just glad my transmission’s not falling out or anything. So that’s a major relief. Major. Cars are among the things I’d rather just not think about – cars, money, and boys. If I didn’t have to think about any of those things my life would be so much easier. Alas, I have to get where I need to go, I have to pay my bills, and I do love the mens.

Update: $250 later and she’s running like a top! Yay. 

“A life lived in chaos is an impossibility”

What I believe is so magnificent, so glorious, that it is beyond finite comprehension. To believe that the universe was created by a purposeful, benign Creator is one thing. To believe that this Creator took on human vesture, accepted death and mortality, was tempted, betrayed, broken, and all for love of us, defies reason. It is so wild that it terrifies some Christians who try to dogmatize their fear by lashing out at other Christians, because tidy Christianity with all answers given is easier than one which reaches out to the wild wonder of God’s love, a love we don’t even have to earn.
- Madeleine L’Engle (November 29, 1918 – September 7, 2007)

One of my favorite people who I never met passed away this Friday. Her books changed me. She was a beautiful woman and will be missed. I imagine that she is at this moment at the feet of her Savior preparing for her journeys in exploration of the universe. She’s walking on water today.

ob-la-dee, ob-la-da…

WordPress has a really nifty little dashboard with blog stats that allow you to see how many people have viewed your page and how they got there if it wasn’t just by typing in the url or using a bookmark. It also shows the search phrases that led people to your blog. So today I look at the blog stats and see that someone found my blog by typing in “corky” + “retard”. ??? Right there is the first time either of those words have ever been used in this blog. I don’t generally use the term “retard” so you know… Anyway, now that those words have actually made their way into these pages, I hope to be getting a huge influx of politically incorrect, but I hopefully good-natured, Life Goes On fans checking out the view.

By the way, since we’re on the topic, how could you not love that show? Becca with her wire-rimmed glasses (I got a pair just like them in 5th grade) and her crush on the gorgeously mulletted Tyler… I remember the episode when they finally got together. It gave nerdy girls all over America hope that we too could date the captain of the football team.

As much as I loved the show and watched it religiously, it always gave me this slightly weird feeling. It was a feeling similar to the one when my middle school guidance counselor would come to class to give “the talk.” I’m not entirely sure why. It’s probably partially because the shows were always giving “life lessons” but I think it also might be because, ever since I was young, some actresses have a quality about them that reminds me of guidance counselors. Patti LuPone (who played the mother on that show) was of those actresses. I can’t really put a finger on a particular source of the quality…but it’s usually older female actresses, who have this mothering, yet sexually open, yet entirely un-sarcastic way about them. Other actress who give me “the guidance counselor feel” are Diane Weist, Patty Duke, and Joanne Woodward and Michael Learned. I know. It’s odd.

In any event, Sunday nights in the early 90’s were good times. Rock on Corky fans.

Just sayin hi.

No particular agenda today. Just wanted to say hi to anyone who might actually read this. Thanks for stopping by. If no one has told you that they love you today, let me be the first. I love you guys. You “rock harder than you ever knew.” By the way, if you can name the band responsible for the quoted phrase without googling you’ll earn 5 gold stars. You want these gold stars man. They’re important.

At work, I got to create and play around with Visio files, which was actually kind of fun. It’s a program that just creates giant flowcharts. This company is all about some flowcharts. The have one for everything. I still have very little idea about what most of the people there are talking about. I mean I thought I had some clue about technology, but these folks are serious. Yesterday I was in a meeting about teleconferencing which was probably the only term I actually understood. The rest of the conversation took place entirely in acronyms. I’m enjoying the new job, though. Its less responsibility and more pay so I’ll take that any day. It is a little odd for me though, because when my boss asks me to schedule a conference room or set up a meeting or schedule his travel, I don’t actually do any of those things. There are people on staff that do each of those things as their job. I just call them. At my previous position I was used to doing everything from start to finish. The nice thing is that I really do have more time and room for creativity and learning which I really enjoy.

After work, I went over to my parents’ house because my great aunt and uncle were in town from VA for a quick visit. They’re good people. I remember loving Hank (my uncle) growing up, because he is and always has been an overgrown kid. One of my favorite memories is going with them to Virginia Beach. He would get out in the water with all of the kids wearing this huge floppy straw hat and as we all floated around in inner tubes he would sing “opera” in a fake Spanish-sounding language at the top of his lungs. It was great. Marty, (my aunt) I actually found slightly scary when I was kid. She’s a very particular sort of person which can be a little intimidating for a kid, but these days I really enjoy her company. She always has some random/odd/funny story to tell either about herself or her family. As I’ve gotten older I really have enjoyed  becoming friends with the adults in my extended family.